Kittens in a Blender- Review

Go home and apologize to your cat...

The genre of table-top card gaming has plenty of great nuanced and complex properties for one to take part in. So much so that pretty much no matter what kind of card gamer you may consider yourself to be there is more than likely something out there for you to play. Some games feature an entire mythology spanning several years of continuity like Magic: The Gathering. Some games have deep deck building mechanics that take a skillful hand and mind to master like Acension. Then there are games like Kittens in a Blender... Fun (and sometimes darkly humorous) time-waster games built around the ideas of quick play, easy to learn rules, and minimum baggage to the concept. While this sort of game isn't for everyone I do think it has its place in the card gaming genre at large.

Before I go any further I do feel it is necessary to address "the elephant in the room" that surrounds this fun little game. This game and I do not in any way endorse/condone the act of putting a real kitten into a high-speed kitchen blender. This is a concept that is quite simply built around a bit of dark tongue-in-cheek humor. Nothing more, nothing less. If the idea of putting cute cuddly cartoon kittens into a comically large blender permanently set on puree' bothers/offends you than I can already assure you that you will not like this game in any capacity. Now with that out of the way...

Snowball is so cute I just love him to pieces.

Kittens in a Blender was created/designed by Brent and Brian Knudson (Nuts, Poo!) of Closet Nerd Games. Released in December of 2011 by Sandstorm Productions, the game was met with modest financial and critical success. Unfortunately Closet Nerd Games was already in financial trouble before the game's release, with the company shutting down a mere four months after the game's launch. For fans it seemed like Kittens in a Blender was quickly in route to be lost in card gaming obscurity. Thankfully in 2012 Redshift Games procured the rights and relaunched the property with a successful crowd-funding Kickstarter campaign.

The rules are simple and easy enough to digest. Within minutes my group and I were playing rounds of the game with the greatest of ease. Up to 4 players select a color (yellow, red, blue, or green) associated with a group of up to 16 kittens in each color. The play area is divided into 3 sections (The Blender, The Counter, and The Box) and it is the player's goal to get as many kittens of their color into The Box, while getting as many of the other player's kittens into The Blender. The entire deck of cards is shuffled and players draw up to a hand of 6 cards. The player possessing the most kittens in their hand goes first with turns moving to the left in the turn cycle.

On a player's turn they must play 2 cards and draw their hand back up to 6 once more. Any player can play any kitten card and control their placement in the play area via movement cards. Movement cards can move kittens anywhere from 1 to 3 sections. For instance I'm looking to save blue kittens, so when a movement card of 2 comes into my hand I can play it to move either two blue kittens away from the blender by one section or move one kitten away from the blender by two sections. By being able to play any other color kitten though this also allows me to use a movement card to potentially place other player's kittens into the blender.  If there are no more cards left in the deck to be drawn there is no reshuffle.

Other cards such as "Dog's in the Kitchen" can cause player's hands to be exchanged to the left/right when it comes into play, changing up the game's paradigm. When a "Blend" or "Blend Pulse" card is played, any kittens in The Blender are eliminated. Blend Pulse cards can be played to block a Blend card though and provide extra time to get kittens out. After a Blend card is played any kittens in The Box are removed and considered safe, while kittens that may have been left on The Counter are automatically moved into The Blender. The game continues until all 16 Blend/Blend Pulse cards have been played, with all surviving kittens in The Box being tallied up for 2 points each. Kittens left on The Counter are not added to the score, and kittens that went in The Blender are minus 1 point. The player with the most points at the very end wins.

D'awww...

Oddly enough the game's mechanics do employ a good deal of strategic choice. While the overall idea of the game is fairly single minded, a player does has to have their head in the game if they really want to win. Paying attention to what is in play to what hasn't been played can be key to victory at points. Knowing that there are only 16 Blend/Blend Pulse cards total in the deck does allow for one to count probabilities, which I know I do often. So in many ways I feel the goal of the player should be to actually leave themselves in the best position possible before a Blend card is played, instead of just eliminating other player's kittens. Players cannot discard cards, so sometimes a bad hand can occur due to the random element of the draw. Thankfully the game moves fast enough that I've seen players make a comeback after having as much as 4 bad hands in a row.

Artwork on the cards is top notch with insanely adorable kittens everywhere. I commend Anne-Julie Painchaud for her excellent theme fitting work as all the kittens feel unique in their depiction with dynamic/expressive mannerisms and bright color palettes. Awesomely funny names such as Ham Sandwich and Goober only help to enhance the game's humor. On many occasions I found myself and other players fighting as hard as we could to save our favorite kittens from their grisly fates. If at some point in the game one player says to the other "Screw you!" you're more than likely playing the game right.

As a quick and fun little card game I think this is perfect for when you want to take a break from the more serious games and cleanse the palette. At only $10 for the entire game there really isn't much one could risk loosing beyond not finding the game appealing. There is an expansion that was made available after the Kickstarter campaign but as of this review I have yet to play it. Now if you'll excuse me, I've got a messy kitchen to clean...

Positive Factors

• For those with a dark sense of humor or those who ever wanted to dice up cute things into pieces, here is your game.
• Quick and easy to learn rules make getting into the game a breeze.
• A surprisingly good amount of strategy to be found in such a simple, albeit cut-throat style game.
• Top notch expressive artwork and fun names for the kittens makes fighting for your favorites a blast.
• Great for when you just want to take a break from the more serious breeds of gaming.
• Low price-point.

Negative Factors

• If you don't like the idea of cute cuddly cartoon cats meeting a nasty end via blender you may want to look elsewhere.
• Fans of more complex/rules crunchy style games may not like the simplistic mechanics.
• Random nature of the draw mechanic can leave a player with a bad hand for several turns.

        

Final Rating: Splenderiffic! (Blenderiffic! If you're really into the spirit of the game!)